Journey of a Thousand Miles

Sometimes our minds tell us lies to make sense of what doesn't make sense. But that doesn't mean those lies are true. Sometimes there is a missing element that hasn't shown itself yet. Give the benefit of the doubt- put your hope in the positive. Put your hope in love. Even though God doesn't seem to show up when we expect Him to, do we still believe that He loves us? If you want to move on, you have to let go of the hurt. Don't become like those who have hurt you. Stay pure of heart.

I see a girl who is struggling so hard to get her head above water. She keeps swimming and can't seem to find the shore. She's tired and wants to give up the fight. She keeps asking for a rescue boat, but God never sends one. He says "I will help you swim. You'll grow really strong, and you'll be able to overcome many obstacles." The waters seem to go on forever with no hope on the horizon for a change. But she can't see what God has for her beyond the horizon: her Promised Land. If she doesn't give up, she'll get there, but she can't stop believing in what she can't see. She will battle many sharks; she's already got scars, both in her heart and on her body. She wonders who to trust and what to believe in. She's growing tired and weary of the fight. She wants to let herself drown, but God is keeping her afloat.  Please don't give up. Please wait and see what's over the horizon. Please keep swimming. 

He took me away from bad exes and healed me from the guilt and shame. He forgave me for that mess. He taught me how to express my emotions. He showed me how He can use my suffering for his good. He got me a job and my car and answered my prayer for a good boyfriend. He helped me to let go of negative friendships. He is teaching me how to forgive. He brought me home to my family. He wants me to experience joy again. He wants me to laugh again. He wants me to experience His love for me. He wants me to use my talents for His good. He wants me to find freedom in forgiveness. He wants me to know true love and stop hiding behind so many layers of hurt. He wants me to heal others. He answered my prayer for a sweet man who loves me for me. He has kept me from dying or getting ill. He has given me all my limbs and parts. He provided jobs for me when I needed money. He provided unemployment when I lost my jobs. He gave me Recovery when I needed help. He gave me counselors. ...

I wrote this when I was 26 years old. I am 33 now, and I still want to be this type of woman:  I want to be the type of woman who loves, appreciates, and accepts herself, imperfections and all. I want to be the type of woman who is not embarrassed by herself, but is gentle with herself. I want to be the type of woman who is gracious to herself and doesn't beat herself up. I want to value the experiences I've had and the lessons I've learned, even the hardest of lessons. I want to be the type of woman who knows who she is and doesn't let anyone else tell her otherwise. I want to be the type of woman who stands up for herself and doesn't back down for anybody. I want to be the type of woman who stands apart from the crowd, who shines out with confidence and doesn't back down out of insecurity. I don't want to hide who I am; I want to give glory to what God has given me. I want to be at ease with myself and at ease with life, knowing that I am exactly where I...

So I have to say, I am very, very excited for this new year. Ain't nobody can stop this year from being amazing, and 2017 is already off to a much better start than 2016. Last year, I was going through a very difficult breakup, and I felt so heartbroken. This year I am in a new, much better relationship with a way better man. And although I don't know where we'll end up, I am just happy to be with someone who is so loving and better than all the others. It's a learning process. I thought I would be single throughout the holidays, and instead God surprised me by reintroducing a special person into my life, and I got to have a boyfriend for Christmas and New Years and my upcoming birthday. Aside from my love life, I am excited for my career this year. I am finishing my album come January and releasing in the Spring, and going on tour in the summer. I plan to write many more songs and seek sync licensing. I know it may be too soon to expect a decent living with music thi...

I just wanted to update because I'm very happy with my life right now. I've been talking to someone new- a crush from high school- and we recently reconnected, and we are finding that we have sooooo much in common, it's not even funny. He might move to Australia with his job, but I am still enjoying this bit of time we have to talk and get to know each other. I can't believe this is my 3rd relationship this year- I usually have 1 relationship per year, and I give myself a long break in between. But I feel that God has lifted the barrier of me not dating anyone, and now He is giving me free reign. So far, so good because I have been dating MUCH better men than my usual. So I am happy because we enjoy all the same hobbies, the same music, the same everything! We do have some differences on religion (he's a Christian, but he doesn't celebrate Christmas), so that may be the make it or break it deal. But in the meantime, I am very happy getting to know him. In ot...

I am pretty excited for my goals for 2017. This was a long, arduous year, but I got through it, and I think next year will be ten times better. I just wanted to share some of my goals for next year (I have a lot). Finish "The Clockmaker's Quest" - This is the book I've been writing since 2007. This year I focused on plotting, and I am not finished, but I hope to finish the first draft next year. Then I will submit to an editor, a critique group, and start finding an agent.  Finish recording and release my 2nd album! - I have already finished writing songs for the album, submitted them to my producer, and I hope to go back to Nashville in January to finish recording. I hope to release sometime in the Spring, then go on tour in the summer.  Get a synch license - I have been researching different ways to make money as an indie artist, and synch licensing is the way to go. Basically, that means getting your songs into TV/film/commercials. They pay big bucks for the...