Frustrations

Well life is going by slowly but surely. I don't always get everything done that I need to, but sometimes you just gotta live life and let interruptions happen. Some days I wish I could expedite my success and reach my goals sooner. There are lots of days that I wish the music industry was still like the old days when record labels still signed and developed new artists. They don't anymore because the industry isn't making money like it used to. Nobody wants to pay for music when they can hear it for free. It's aggravating for someone like me who wishes they could make a living with music, but it feels like an upward battle, like swimming upstream in a waterfall.

Some days I wonder if I should pursue a new dream and give up on music entirely. Then somebody will hear my music and love it and tell me not to give up. So I don't. I keep plucking away on my guitar, writing new songs, wondering when I should record and whether or not I'll ever "make it." Luckily, I do have other dreams up my sleeve that I will be pursuing. All I know is that I don't want to sit behind a desk for the rest of my life.

Do you ever feel stuck in your circumstances? Today I was feeling stuck. Like I try so hard to change my circumstances, but I wake up, and it's all the same. They say that daily progress moves you forward, and success takes time, but I'm very impatient, and I hate doing these daily tasks. It makes me want to give up. I just want to get to the finish line already. Daily life is so... daily.

Then I wonder if my prayers are actually going anywhere. I can see my prayers work for other people in their lives, but it seems that dreams just don't come true in this world. It seems like dreams will only come true when we get to heaven. I try to enjoy life day by day, but I really hate where I am. I hate working a full time job. I was never made for full time work. I guess that's the way of an artist. I just wish God would move a little quicker and open a door here and there, so I don't have to feel like I'm doing everything on my own.

I guess I just need to learn to enjoy life as it is while working for what I truly want...

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