Returning Home

Written in 2012 before I moved back home:

After 3 years of living in Austin, I think it's time for me to go home, regardless if I find a job or not. I've learned a lot here. I have fallen and gotten back up repeatedly. My friendships have evolved as I've grown closer to my true values. I have learned to believe and follow my dreams. I have learned to live a more meaningful life. I have learned what really matters to me. I thought I would find love out here, but God had other plans; maybe He didn't want me to stay here. Maybe He wanted me to return home to my family. I have learned to set boundaries and to not allow people to hold me back from my goals and dreams. I have let go of a lot of guilt and shame I held onto for so long, and I have learned to find my identity in Christ and not in what others think of me. I found a career that better fulfills me, and I am still striving towards my dreams so I can escape the day job. I got out of retail like I hoped, I had fun adventures (and I hope I will have more), but it's time for me to find a resting point. I have fallen in and out of love, gotten burned, and broken hearts as well. I know God has a good plan for me and hopefully a good love life. I know He hasn't forgotten me. I want to believe that He will answer my prayers. For now, I feel that this is the best plan for my life right now, and I hope I can still continue to follow my dreams in Houston. If my dreams bring me back to Austin, then hopefully I can come back here with my zeal restored and with a fresh, new perspective. But I need home more than anything else right now.

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