Heartbroken

There are times in my life when I feel crushed by the weight of dashed hopes, unanswered prayers, and broken dreams. Every day, there's a reminder of what could've been, should've been, or what I wish would come to pass. Before, I didn't have an explanation for the heavy weight I felt in my heart, but lately I've started to label it as grief and sorrow. Sometimes it comes out as anger, but when I look past all the layers, there is a deep sorrow that runs in my soul. It begs God every day for deliverance, and every now and again, I get consoling, but it always comes back again.  I began to search for guidance and wanted to share my findings with you, in case you are also struggling with heartbreak.

"The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18

First, have peace in knowing that you have a God and a Jesus who understand the weight of grief and loss. Our Father was grieved when His people disobeyed Him, causing the great Fall that damaged us all and separated us from Him. When we continued to disobey Him, He was sorry that He ever made man. He wiped us all out from the face of the earth in the Great Flood (except for Noah and his family). Jesus also experienced great loss when God forsake him to nail him to the cross and redeem us all from that great Fall. Jesus was so grieved that he sweat blood. Have you ever sweat blood? Can't say that I have...

 "Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me."  John 14:1

One of the fears we have during grief is that we will never be happy again, it will never end, and we will always live in this darkness. The only way there can be darkness is if there is a light. There is a season for everything, so you will come out of this. There is hope. You can't live in a shadow if there's no such thing as light. You will make your way to light. God didn't let His people grieve forever. He comforted them and does not take delight in causing us sorrow. He wants us to feel joy and peace again.

"Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved."  Psalm 55:22

Now, you must allow yourself to grieve. One of the great temptations on earth is to ease the pain. There are a myriad of ways we do this. Sometimes we don't even know what's wrong with us; we don't know how deep our sadness runs. We think we are just moody, depressed, angry, anxious, afraid, etc. We take to alcohol, pain meds, partying, codependency, movies, social media... anything to distract us from the pain. When it gets quiet at night, you start to see the pain, and it scares you. That's when you need to allow yourself to grieve. Let the tears flow until you can't cry anymore. Journal and pray for God's comfort during this time.

“To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven: a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance.”  Ecclesiastes 3:1,4

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