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Showing posts from September, 2012

The Safer Route

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Recently I had a talk with a guy about a job opportunity. Truthfully, I didn't want this job, but I've been feeling like I "should" be a responsible adult and "go out and get a job." I don't think this feeling came from God exactly; I think it came from my fears that I can't do what I really want to do. I started freaking out that I may not be successful at what I want to do. It became clear to me that I may not be able to make a living  out of what I want to be doing. Atleast not for awhile. So I started searching for the easy way out of pursuing my dreams: get a job. While on the phone with this guy, he started asking me point blank questions. About my resume. About my aspirations. About why I was moving home. About why I've had so many jobs in such a short amount of time (that one kind of burned). And since he was being so blunt, I decided to be blunt myself. I told him about my dreams and aspirations. About my plans when I move home

Just Be Human

Sometimes during the Women's Development Program, girls would say, "God is wrecking me up lately." It happened alot on the mission trip, and it would coincide with lots of crying and hugging and praying. I have to say, I couldn't totally relate because I felt at peace with how things were going, and I thought they were just in the Emotional Sandbox (that's when your emotions are overreacting to reality). But recently, I have found myself in their boat, and now it's my turn to say: God is wrecking me up lately.  There are times in life when I'll pray for something that I really, really  want, and I'll do whatever it takes to get it, and God just flat out says, "No." Then I have a mini-meltdown and do everything short of pounding my fists on the floor, trying to beg God to change His mind and give me another chance (side note: I don't think this has ever worked once in my life, but that doesn't stop me from trying!). Lately, my unans

The show must go on!

Sometimes I find myself in a waiting period of life, waiting for God to give me an answer or direction. I have about 20 options in front of me, and I wish I could take all of them, but nobody has that kind of time. God works slowly sometimes, and I am a restless being that thrives on movement. I am forced to be patient and wait. So I have taken up the Bible for some wisdom on this topic. Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the LORD! It's during the waiting periods when I feel crushed in spirit that I need the most courage to carry on. It is so tempting to despair, but I have to keep pressing onward. When life is too much to bear, the show must go on. May the LORD give strength to his people! May the LORD bless his people with peace! It's hard when our prayers aren't answered, and we must keep praying in faith that He will answer in His best way. We have to trust that He knows what's best for us, and our plans our futile... e